I want to share with you a bit about Damians feelings leading up to our sensual night of exploring my dominance and his submission in BDSM. Being that I write in 1st person, a lot of my feelings are expressed, and I feel it is important to capture what Damian feels and experiences as well. He is very introverted but also a very feeling person.
I remember him joking a lot and pointing out what he considered to be “signs” but more likely just coincidence. For instance, there was all of a sudden a new beverage at our favorite store called “kinky drink,” and also a new “ultimate sausage” beyond meat product. There were advertisements of “bending over” and “submitting for pleasure.” And many more, but I’m pretty sure that he was just so micro focused that any item could have been made into a sexual construct. It was just so funny to see his excitement as the day approached.
In the days leading up to the delivery, Damian had a lot of inhibitions. He was excited and nervous but also wasn’t sure if he was ready or even willing to go through with it. A few times he even considered backing out entirely. Day after day it would play through his mind, some days causing physical symptoms of nausea and clouded thinking, almost to the point of panic! It was actually pretty sexy to me because Damian has always been my rock, full of strength, confidence and dominance. So to see such a vulnerable side of him really turned me on.
Another set back that really had him concerned was, I love to talk. I love to share everything about everything with my friends! (And I have ALOT of close girlfriends) We will gossip and share story’s, blah, blah, blah and this constantly went through his mind. He did mention it a few times telling me that this is our private business, our sexy secret and I couldn’t share with my friends….which to me is a bummer because some of my friends are uptight and could learn a thing or two that might help them in their marriages. But I made a promise and so far have kept it. We have talked about eventually unveiling this secret to a few close knit pals that we know would benefit, but in the meantime, we will continue on our journey to discover all of the positive and negative BDSM offers. And be able to give thorough, sound advice to loved ones. Besides, most of the couples we know are extremely closed minded and frigid, and would most likely look down on this type of intimacy. And though we don’t care what people think about us, We don’t need close friends pulling away or passing judgement on our personal sexual experiences.
It was our communication, I believe, that got him through, what seemed like an eternity of waiting. We constantly comforted each other, gently sharing our concerns and our excitements. And we made sure that we both remained on board. My feelings were mainly excitement, but I wasn’t the one trying something for the first time. We have experienced anal, but I was the recipient, and without any added enhancements, besides booze! I personally do not prefer to be on the receiving end of anal pegging, but only because my G spot is not stimulated during this act. It’s more discomfort then anything. A mans G spot, is actually a P spot, and it is accessed right through the anus near the internal root of the penis. So double stimulation bonus during penetration. And for that reason, though Damian has doubts, I was beyond elated to go all the way! Let’s do this!